Consumed by Consumerism: Get a Hold of Yourself, Woman!

I'm missing the gorgeous summerweather. Today was rainy, windy and about 10°celsius colder than the week before, so I'm posting these pics from a few days ago to relive that glorious weather <3 so EXCUSE ME while I bombard you guys with pics.

Why can't every day be sunny like this?

Also, rant ahead: I came across this post about a girl trying to come to grips with her compulsive shopping today and it sort of touched me. I think most of us have at one time in our lives been confronted with a compulsion to consume, but most of us don't admit it to ourselves, let alone the internet! This girl is very brave for admitting to herself that her behavior is getting problematic, without going all "oh, girls will be girls, teehee" on our asses. I hate it when women do that. As if we don't have any self control when it comes to shoes/clothes/chocolate/jewelry/pink stuff/anything cliché girly. Own that shit, woman. You are not a slave of your desire to buy. Every time you take out your wallet to add another piece to your collection, you are making a conscious decision.

I feel like the issue of compulsive buying definitely has a lot of relevancy in our little blogosphere. A lot of girls who are "into fashion" are actually just compulsive shoppers if you ask me, using their free blogger domains to validate their addictions. Not all of us experience this to the same extent, but I'm sure we can all recognize that little voice in your head that tells you "You DESERVE that piece! It's different from everything you own! You might never find a piece quite like it!", and all of that might in fact be true. But the question you need to ask yourself is: do you NEED that piece? Will it infinitely improve your life? Will you lose your fashion credentials if you pass up on it? Let me make it easy for you: unless you are pondering on buying unmentionables because the elastic on your old pair has gone droopier than Charlie Sheen's eyes after a day of binging on  a drug called Charlie Sheen, the answer is NO. You do not need it. You WANT it, but you don't need it. You can walk away from it if your funds are insufficient. 

If you worry about your parents or boyfriend getting mad at you for coming home with yet ANOTHER shopping bag, or if you are concerned about even finding closet space to put your new goodies: put it down and walk away. Your life will not instantly get better if you give in to your every urge. You are not a 6 year old that *NEEDS* that cookie. When you are secretly shopping and hiding your purchases, you're not only lying to the people who love you. You are lying to yourself.

Society basically runs on us buying crap. Our spending habits are the oil to the capitalist motor. Everyday and everywhere we are forcefed images of new products in flashy packages, must haves or things we should definitely "try out" if we ever want to live a fulfilled life. And when we've finally caved and bought one item, we inevitably feel let down by it not giving us what it promised, so we move on to the next piece of crap that still holds the promise of making us look and feel like a supermodel. We have gone past that stage of being aware of all the manipulation going on around us, settled into a postmodern, jaded state of being. Yeah, we are aware of things like product placement, photoshop, fake fantasies and all that jazz. We soothe our worried minds by telling ourselves we buy into all that crap voluntarily. After all, that's just how society is, right? Why try and fight it? 

I'd rather die than accept the role of a passive yeahsayer. You only have one life to live, so be sure you live it yourself instead of being lived.

I know giving up impulse buys is easier said than done. Believe me, I am not imune to it either. But I thought I might give my sweet readers a few tips on how to cope with this addiction. Here's The Styling Dutchman's Three Step Plan.

1. Are you aware of the fact that you're spending a lot of money on randomness, but the gravity of the situation hasn't exactly sunk in? Keep track of what you buy: make a list, including price, and keep all your purchases of the last month separated from your wardrobe. This way, you'll get a clear view on your spending pattern, as well as a visual reminder of how many things you actually acquire within the short timespan of one month.

2. Next step: you have established the fact that yes, you spend too much money on stuff you don't need. What are you going to do now? You are going to do some soulsearching. Why are you a compulsive shopper? Maybe you feel naked without the newest styles as a harness to shield your insecurity and vulnerability from the harsh outside world. Maybe you are bored out of your mind and use shopping as a quick fix, a shot of adrenaline, a way to make your life a bit less grey. Or maybe you are just still on the search for your personal style, sniffing out every new trend to try it on for size. I can't help you with these problems, you'll have to help yourself. But acknowledging the deeper cause for the symptom of your shopping addiction might be the first step to controlling it.

3. Last step: deal with it. Be aware of your insecurities, shield yourself for those moments of weakness. Don't go shopping during your lunchbreak for instance, but read a stimulating book. Be very conscious about every purchase, asking yourself why you feel like you need this garment right now. If you are one of those girls who have a closet full of garments but still find themselves wasting time in the morning, not finding anything to wear: try the 30 for 30 challenge. Google it, you'll find loads of blogs who've commited themselves to it. This challenge will help you rediscover your wardrobe and your sense of style, pushing you out of your comfort zone and forcing you to develop your own voice. Another good tip I can give you: put together an image in your mind of the girl you would like to be/would like to look like. Every time you put together an outfit or contemplate spluring on an item, ask yourself whether that girl in your head would wear it/buy it. You'll find your impulse buys drastically decreasing, and it makes getting dressed in the morning THAT much easier. My imaginary icon? A mix of Alexa Chung, Peggy Olson and a sixties schoolgirl.

Be sure to tell me about your experiences with being a slave of consumerist society, or share your tips on how to break loose with us!

And remember: there is a world of difference between "fashion" and "style".

skirt: T2 vintage

croptop: altered New Look

ballet flats: old, don't remember

glasses: Claire's

ring: Alex Monroe