FASHION AND FINDING MYSELF

Time for my latest EIU editorial!

To some, life is about finding your one true love, be it a partner or a calling. For me, life is about finding myself. Fashion gets a bad rep for being superficial and ephemeral, but style has been my road to freedom and independency for as long as I can remember. Follow me through my formative fashion years as I find myself, one fabulous pair of shoes at a time.


The Early Years: Pretty Princess

I’m sure every person reading this remembers spending hours and hours playing dress up as a kid. Rummaging through old clothes belonging to your mom/grandmom, trying on heels way too big, messing about with old make up, taking in the smells and feels of what being a grown up must feel like. I loved the smell of my mom’s make up bag, the powdery sweetness and how it all alluded to the mystery that is femininity.

And of course, my mom didn’t mind my inclination for dressing up. There was nothing I loved more than having her dress me up in frilly dresses, braid my hair with ribbons and skipping about, tattling away in my own make believe world where I was either a princess, a gypsy, a cat, a ninja or all of the above. My parents let me wear whatever I wanted: I was a very free and creative kid. Proof: the veil I'm wearing with my ballerina dress is actually an old curtain. And I HAD to include the nose-picking picture.

Sadly, it is very hard to maintain that freedom throughout our formative years. Somehow, insecurity and puberty get in the way.



Teenage Wasteland: Awkward Individuality

Being a teenager is all about finding the delicate balance between fitting in and standing out: you don’t want to be bullied, but you are hankering for a sense of identity. Getting dressed is a never ending struggle between who you want to be and who you are expected to be: who you ARE seems to get lost somewhere in the process.
I started out dressing in jeans and band T’s, mixed with hand-me-down hoodies that belonged to my older brothers, like the House of Pain hoodie you see me wearing in the collage. But as I got older, I found my niche: punkrock. Plaid, lace up boots, red and black, distressed denim and safety pins were my code words. At one point I cut my hair short and dyed it bright red, and I wore safetypins through my ears. Sadly, being a teenager also means you don’t like having your picture taken, so it is very hard to find pictures to illustrate my style. 

Everyone should have a few years of reckless abandon, of doing stupid things just because you thought them up, of rebelling just for the sake of rebelling, of feeling incredibly cool and incredibly insecure at the same time. Puberty is a horrible, delightful stage in life, and our doubtful fashion choices and lanky bodies express the awkwardness of this fase.
Don’t even get me started on boy trouble.

And so sorry for flipping you guys the bird!



Matured Style: Return To Femininity

Part 1

Slowly I grew out of puberty and into myself. I didn’t feel the need to try so hard anymore and I went for simple, cute, basic outfits. I cut my hair short again as a way to shed my childhood years, but I allowed myself to let some sweetness enter my wardrobe: florals, pinks, dresses and ballet flats. This was the year I worked in retail to save up for university, so practicallity and comfort were key!

After about a year of mostly wearing typical jeans + cute top + sneakers, I went through a fase where I wore dresses almost exclusively. This is the point in time where I discovered styleblogs, and Chictopia in particular. I was bombarded with inspiration, and the distillation of my own style began. Finding my silhouette was the first step: trying to be comfortable with the shape of my body and how it looked in clothes. I hated my boyish figure in jeans, so dresses were my salvation: I stuck to the safest options, dresses with black tights and boots, not really styling anything but just choosing one piece to create a look. As I said, I kept it safe and easy. This wasn’t maturity of style just yet.



Part 2

I started finding my confidence: I ventured out of my safety zone, mixing prints, combining colors, choosing silhouettes that wouldn’t necessarily “make my best features stand out”. In short, I let go of all the ridiculous little rules and regulations you pick up when reading style magazines, and I started thinking for myself. Who cares if midi skirts should be paired with heels in order not to look like a midget: flats are cute! So what if orange and red clash: I love the vibrancy! Tan isn’t really suitable for a winter-type like me? Whatever, I love my tan trenchcoat. In short: I started having fun with style instead of being concerned with “looking good” or fashion fads.
Also, this collage makes me realize I basically have 2 poses. AWKWARD


Stylevolution: Finding Your Voice

This is what fashion is about. It is a bit like growing up: at first, during your fashion childhood, you are blissfully unaware of the rules that tell you what goes with what: you just wear whatever looks nice to you.

But once fashion puberty hits, you start overthinking it. Insecurity makes your fashion voice break, and you cling to whatever brings you a sense of certainty: silly rules in magazines, trend reports and whatever your style idol is wearing. You fit right into a clique, a fashion-subculture, and you look just like your style-peers.

Slowly, you enter fashion adulthood, as you find your own voice again. Your clothes tell a story, express who you are instead of who you wish you’d be, and you don’t frantically look for tips or confirmations that you’re “doing it right”. You just KNOW you are right, because you are the only one who could do YOU right.

Do you feel like you have found your voice in fashion, or are you still searching? Check out my Chictopia post here!
And let me know what you think :-)

48 comments

  1. Wat leuk zeg, heel origineel, durven volgens mij niet veel bloggers aan!:P

    ReplyDelete
  2. love this post!! its very cute how you've evolved!! and i love the super short haircut on you <3

    ReplyDelete
  3. I lovee this post! You described that childhood dress up phase perfectly-- I felt like I was back in my mom's closet! So cool to see how you've changed-- you are all grown up and fashionista!
    La Petite Marmoset

    ReplyDelete
  4. Love that emo pic in the second collage! :D
    It's great to see how your style evolved, I love the result, I must say :)
    I went through pretty much the same stages, except that I hated the way my mother used to cut my hair and dress me when I was a kid. That may explain my urge to become a punk when I was about 14 :D

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love this post. It mirrors my experiences as a teenager/young adult as well. I went through this emo/goth phase in high school and let's just say that my style is so very different than those years. I think I have found my fashion voice (finally) after 26 years! I have returned to feminine pieces and I couldn't be more happy. Thanks for posting this! I loved reading it. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  6. I fucking LOVE you for writing this post! I have been wanting to write a post like this for a while and I love how you did yours. It seems like you put a lot of thought and effort into this post and it shows a lot! Thanks for sharing your stylevolution!

    ReplyDelete
  7. What an excellent post. On the verge of 30, I feel like I am only just figuring out my personal style & how this reflects who I am ... or maybe it's just an ever evolving process.

    http://elegantlyacademic.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  8. Gorgeous post it was like reading about myself so realatable for every woman out there :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. I thinks is a wonderfoul idea post pictures of looks of yourself on your life..i think im gonna do it same too i found so sos auentic!!!
    Kiises adorable girl!!!

    ReplyDelete
  10. loved reading this honey, so funny and interesting to see how you have evolved. makes me wanna flip through my old albums and do a similar one just for the fun. i love the style you have 'found' yourself with, so perfect even i could see an item and say 'that's so annebeth' hehe xo oh and dont stress about the wholesale dress thing, id seen it on a few blogs so its not your fault at all, you're not the stupid company. the dress i got is ok, its quite small which i was sort of expecting cos its asian but ill prob still wear it, the materials quite shit though, i guess you get what you pay for :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. I loved reading this, truly identify myself too. You pretty much summed up what I went through too, except I think I didn't have a punk phase, just some when I wore what everyone in my school wore too, blahh teenage years.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Love all of these pics! I've said it before, but you look AMAZING in red! I love all of your red outfits.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Wow I love seeing this evolution! Ive been finding my own style more recently too :)
    http://www.closet-fashionista.com

    ReplyDelete
  14. this is so personal and at the same time it's so universal, inspiring and true =) love this ..Anieblu is right. maybe someday i'll do a post like this if you wouldn't mind. :P i will mention the source of the idea. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  15. fashion is my passion and im still a teenager so i feel like im still searching in some way but i found a part of it :) and this is such a cute post! i love the pictures! and thanks for your comment, your so sweet <3

    ReplyDelete
  16. Being wowed by your outfits on Chictopia and having found your lovely blog just recently, I must say that this post makes me relate to you even more. Love the pictures and musings – it seems to be a universal experience. I’m right in the middle of the last phase, and blogs like yours inspire me most to dare to experiment with my style.
    By the way, I’m so jealous of you living in Antwerp  - I’ve just been there again, and I love it!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Really great post! I love seeing the pictures from your past. I think our style journey was pretty similar in many ways. Though I feel like I'm still feeling out my style and it's always changing. I don't know if I'll ever find that one style I can stick with. It's just got to be "me"!
    XOXO

    ReplyDelete
  18. Awwwww... actually I think my favourite thing is that you look back on all of it with fondness. Perhaps in the future you'll look back on this phase as the "blogger queen" phase of life!

    Love your poses... I have a kind of "ballerina pose" which I use way to much (good for rearranging lunch into a less recognizable form) and of course, "hand as hat" is always a classic!

    ReplyDelete
  19. oh girl, I totally recognize myself. about teenager identity you are so right: I went from a Hippie, grunge, house, completely wrong, now, ... for the record the music from high school is still the best music around, so fashion identity and music are so connected. what i love to see is that you have found your fabulous fashion identity. you can analyze yourself so well!!!! I do not like part on because to me it is a little bit dull, but it is as you said you were looking (this was for me my completely wrong fase). but now: and you are glowing when you show your looks. it is like a perfect match and that is why i am a fan.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Wat is dit mooi geschreven zeg! En eng herkenbaar ook! Mooi hoe het een beschrijving van jouw leven is, maar toch ook voor anderen en ook voor mij zo ontzettend herkenbaar is. Vind het vooral geweldig om te lezen dat jij ook door de rebelse donkere puber fase heen bent gegaan.
    Vind het prachtig om te lezen hoe jij jezelf beschrijft en wat voor een ongelofelijk goede zelfkennis je hebt. Lijkt me heerlijk! Ik ben nog altijd een beetje zoekende haha :)
    Echt chapeau voor dit stuk! Ik ben ook altijd zo onder de indruk van jouw engels, alsof het je tweede taal is ofzo.
    Je bent een inspiratie! :)
    x M

    ReplyDelete
  21. This is a brilliant post! It was awesome seeing how you evolved and fun comparing it to my own "style transformation". I feel more and more comfortable with my style everyday. About a year or so ago, I wouldn't try certain things on in a store because I was afraid I'd be judged by the people I was shopping with. That seems so silly to me now! I try whatever the hell I want, and so often I am pleased with the results. :D

    ReplyDelete
  22. Geweldige & originele post ! Fijn om te zien hoe je er vroeger bij liep.. Ik zou het niet durven te posten :p

    En hey, het is ok om 2 poses te hebben :p

    xx

    ReplyDelete
  23. Haha cute. I like the pic of you as a little girl picking your nose. Classy. Thanks for coming by my blog!

    ReplyDelete
  24. what a cool post!!! but i must say the refined 2010 style is lovely!!! i wonder what your style will be like in a few yrs!! :)

    <3 steffy
    steffysprosandcons.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  25. aww haha this post is adorable. i love seeing the transitions!! and your poses are not awkward at all. i want to do a post like this now! haha

    ReplyDelete
  26. Such a wonderful post!
    Style through the years is always fun to look at, and I love your commentary.
    As for your current style, the Beatles tee combined with the midi is perfection. And you can pull off the flats! I don't think my shortness will allow me to, haha.
    Following now,

    Rosie x

    ReplyDelete
  27. This is absolutely my favorite article you've ever done. I love seeing bloggers style as it emerges. I certainly wasn't born with a sense of style, it's developed, changed and gone through many phases over the years. I love your punk rock years, I went through a very similar phase. But I was more grunge metalhead. tres chic?
    I really love seeing the transitions you've gone through, this is such a great article!!
    xJennaD

    ReplyDelete
  28. What a wonderful post! I love seeing your early years :)

    I think I've really found my style in the last year and a half or so. Maybe I'll have to take a page out of your book and do a bit of a retrospective or something. I had a really hilarious 50s-housewife-in-chuck-taylors phase for a while. That was pretty... unique!

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  29. Great post. I love retrospects.
    It's interesting though how the red plaid seemed to survive through your years. A classic.

    ReplyDelete
  30. This is such a great inspirational post. I love seeing the evolution of your style.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I really enjoyed reading this post and visually seeing your journey to yourself! I think it is a beautiful thing when we, especially women, can get to the point where fashion is fun, and we dress for ourselves and not to please others. It really is liberating!

    Oh and I love the midi skirt paired with the beatles tee!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Love this post. We all go through an evolution of style and I think we can agree that individuality is key.
    And you can flip us the bird anytime;)

    ReplyDelete
  33. This is a wonderful post. It's so interesting to see your style evolve and what is particularly fascinating is that your style now relates to the first photos when you were little, particularly with the colour and the dresses.

    ReplyDelete
  34. This is so great! I love that you shared your style photos as you grew up. Sometimes it's so embarrassing to look back on teen years and bad outfits, but they definitely formed the style we wear today.

    Thanks for sharing :)

    ReplyDelete
  35. That was wonderful fun. i loved seeing all the old photos of you!! You've definitely transformed through different aspects of fashion.

    ReplyDelete
  36. That was wonderful fun. i loved seeing all the old photos of you!! You've definitely transformed through different aspects of fashion.

    ReplyDelete
  37. This is so great! I love that you shared your style photos as you grew up. Sometimes it's so embarrassing to look back on teen years and bad outfits, but they definitely formed the style we wear today.

    Thanks for sharing :)

    ReplyDelete
  38. This is a wonderful post. It's so interesting to see your style evolve and what is particularly fascinating is that your style now relates to the first photos when you were little, particularly with the colour and the dresses.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Love this post. We all go through an evolution of style and I think we can agree that individuality is key.
    And you can flip us the bird anytime;)

    ReplyDelete
  40. This is such a great inspirational post. I love seeing the evolution of your style.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Love all of these pics! I've said it before, but you look AMAZING in red! I love all of your red outfits.

    ReplyDelete
  42. I thinks is a wonderfoul idea post pictures of looks of yourself on your life..i think im gonna do it same too i found so sos auentic!!!
    Kiises adorable girl!!!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Gorgeous post it was like reading about myself so realatable for every woman out there :)

    ReplyDelete
  44. I fucking LOVE you for writing this post! I have been wanting to write a post like this for a while and I love how you did yours. It seems like you put a lot of thought and effort into this post and it shows a lot! Thanks for sharing your stylevolution!

    ReplyDelete
  45. Love that emo pic in the second collage! :D
    It's great to see how your style evolved, I love the result, I must say :)
    I went through pretty much the same stages, except that I hated the way my mother used to cut my hair and dress me when I was a kid. That may explain my urge to become a punk when I was about 14 :D

    ReplyDelete
  46. I lovee this post! You described that childhood dress up phase perfectly-- I felt like I was back in my mom's closet! So cool to see how you've changed-- you are all grown up and fashionista!
    La Petite Marmoset

    ReplyDelete
  47. Wat leuk zeg, heel origineel, durven volgens mij niet veel bloggers aan!:P

    ReplyDelete