Last week, my sister celebrated her 20th birthday. 20 is a special birthday, first year as a real "adult". 18 is still a teenager, you know? Or at least that's what it feels like to me. So now my baby sis is not such a baby anymore. I feel all those feelings everyone always describes in situations like these: she'll always be my baby sis so she'll never stop being a kid to me, I'm proud of the woman she has become, and the older we get the more I really appreciate both our differences and our similarities.
But most of all, she grows. She becomes more of a fully realized human being with every passing day, accumulating experiences and building her future with her feet firmly grounded in the present. But it's the past that makes her who she is to me, the crappy, difficult, About A Boy-esque (just imagine Marcus having three siblings and a volatile, absent dad in addition to the unstable mom) past we share. That's why family is so important. They speak a language no one else will ever understand, can get you in ways no one else will ever get you.
If you've moved around a lot in your life, you'll know the feeling of freedom, endless possibility and space that comes with it. You'll also know the yearning to belong somewhere, to feel safe, to find the empty place in the puzzle to fit your jigsaw piece. The older I get, the more I realize that there is no place you "belong". The key to that feeling of security lies in trust. Trust in yourself, that you'll be able to take care of yourself no matter what happens. And trust in others, the people that have been a part of your life for so long that they've helped form the person you are today. Believing that they'll be there for you, even if they're not always perfect. And accepting that same imperfection in yourself. And on the days that doesn't work, buying/eating stuff also helps. Just a tip. Well, a confession.
This is getting rather long winded but people like my boyfriend, my sister and some close friends are that to me. Anchorage. Home. Or just the people who get my inside jokes. Because no man is an island! And two people isn't enough. You need backup. If you're only two people, and someone drops off the edge, then you're on your own. Two isn't a large enough number. You need three at least. So thanks for being a part of my archipelago since 1993, sis!
That pixy cut was so perfect on you! And congratulations to little sis. Am I wrong, or has she been a bad blogger lately?
ReplyDeleteshe's been very busy with regular life :)
ReplyDeleteHooray for your sister's birthday! I love these pictures of you two. There's nothing like having a sister - especially one you're actually close with!
ReplyDeleteSmoesjes smoesjes! :p
ReplyDeleteWell written as always. I really loved this part:
ReplyDelete"And trust in others, the people that
have been a part of your life for so long that they've helped form the
person you are today. Believing that they'll be there for you, even if
they're not always perfect. And accepting that same imperfection in
yourself. And on the days that doesn't work, buying/eating stuff also
helps. Just a tip. Well, a confession"
Wise words :)