Thinspo


I've had an interaction on my Tumblr about the thinspo and selfharm pictures that have been flooding my feed. I have a habit of following back everyone that follows me on Tumblr, so I ended up following girls that reblogged pictures like this one:

along with a comment like "I wish my legs looked like this". I cannot comprehend why no one replies to these kinds of posts, expressing how disturbing this is. So I did reply, and this is what I sent into the Tumbler universe:

"Why is tumblr filled with girls reblogging things like this? You DON’T want legs like these, because if you had legs like these it would probably hurt just to walk around. You need fat to protect your body. Just wearing shoes might PERMANENTLY damage your feet. Saying you want legs like these basically like saying you want cancer.
Insecurity won’t go away when you look like a walking corpse. Body diversity is beautiful, and you are more than your looks."

One of my followers, Charlotte, replied: 

@stylingdutchman
"You are so amazing. Thank god for people like you saying things like this."

To which I replied:

":) I’m just trying to make a tiny difference. Don’t know if I will, but I can try. It breaks my heart to see girls reblogging this, or pictures of self harm. Why doesn’t anyone speak up or console these girls? I remember that age where, when someone tells you looks aren’t everything, you just think to yourself “yeah, that’s easy to say when you’re gorgeous yourself” or “yeah right, the ugly girl’s way to make herself feel better”. But it’s not like that at all.
Just look at yourself as your best friend: would you hate your best friend if she didn’t look like a barbiedoll, but rather just like a cool individual? Or your boyfriend: did you fall for his perfect abs or for his PERSONALITY?
You need to be your own best friend, love yourself for who you are, praise the things that make you unique rather than trying to fit a ridiculous mold. Why the hell would anyone deserve hate because they aren’t sickly skinny? Just as bad as racism, sexism or gay-hate. Just because your hate is geared at your own person doesn’t make it right.
I’m not saying that eating disorders are easy. I’m not saying you can just turn an affliction like that on or off just by reading some random girl’s thoughts. But I can only do what I can do, and that is voicing my acceptance of every individual, and my love for their unique shapes. And I hope these people get help."

I'm posting this on my blog because I want to reach all my readers. I accept you guys, every little wrinkle, fat roll, hair in unwanted places, lack of boobs: whatever.  These things do not matter, and they shouldn't control your life. YOU should be in control, and choose which things you allow to control you. I hope this helps someone. Or rather: I hope this helps someone help themselves.

dress: second hand
shoes: don't remember
sheer tights, coat: H&M
headband: don't remember

PS: I'm not 100% sure about this coat with this dress, but some girls suggested wearing leopard with bright colors when I posted my conundrum (somehow I find leopard very hard to style), so I just went ahead and tried it. I'll need to keep looking though :(

56 comments

  1. I got a little worried when I read the title, but I'm glad I scrolled down to the text. I saw your tumblr post this morning. It blows my mind how many girls on tumblr post things like this. I was glad to see you put your own spin on it, and put out an opinion I actually agree with. I've just started tumbling, and I too have been just following everyone back. However, I will unfollow anyone who posts anything I find negative or offensive. Images can poison the mind, and I'm just not going down like that. I really do applaud your stand.... and wow that was long. :P

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  2. For sure! I am 100% with you. It's strange how, even with all of the positive reinforcement and real live fashion communities like "blogland" and chictopia and whatnot, there are still pics like this and girls that want to look that way. Look at 95% of the girls on chictopia... I see plenty of healthy-looking, beautiful females that are stylish and unique. I think people need to open up their eyes to reality and not just "artful" bullshit that circulates the internet.
    On another note... your dress is cute n kinda funky. it made me think of a 60's flight attendant for some reason (not with the coat though :-))

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  3. Woehoe nice coat :)

    x
    Sarah
    http://lafilledejoujouelle.blogspot.com

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  4. That dress is the cutest thing! It's definitely my style. I like it with the leopard. I'm really into funky mixes that are unexpected. I'm sure a lot of people will say something lame like "Hey, that doesn't match!" But being matchy matchy is so unnecessary now a days. Mixing something original like different prints or weird colors is encouraged.

    As for those scary looking legs... I'm SO happy that you think they are sick. I've noticed a particular blogger who has the scariest looking legs. Not naturally skinny looking. I mean STARVED and so many girls comment saying they are jealous of her legs! I am a personal weight trainer and I'm really a fan of strong, healthy, and muscular shape. Those legs look so fragile and disgusting. I don't understand how anyone could desire a look like that.

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  5. If I haven't told you lately (and I probably haven't), you are seriously awesome! Seriously, seriously awesome.

    xoxo ~ Courtney
    http://sartorialsidelines.blogspot.com

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  6. nice comment ! I totally agree with you. Oh my gosh...how this planet would look like if we all would be skinny...totally boring and unpleseant right?
    Beauty comes from inside not from scary looking legs!
    Congrats on the attitude .

    P.S. I love the dress and I think the leopard looks nice with it :)
    take care

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  7. I am disgusted by that! Worried for those girls, thank god you're not one of them! I love the leopard and brights mix, works on you!
    La Petite Marmoset

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  8. Thank you so much for saying something. Also, thank you for going beyond the fluff. There are way too many bloggers out there that just leave it at, "OMG! Just love yourself! You're amazing!" When the issue is so much deeper than that. The message that is being sent to girls is chilling. I think about the voice that has been given to women over the years and think about all of the challenges women have faced to be heard... and what do we say? We talk about wanting someone else's legs, someone else's body, someone else's wardrobe, someone else's life.

    It took me a long time to get to the point where I am happy with my body, my emotions, and myself. It wasn't easy and I had to fight like hell to get here. Loving yourself isn't easy, but it is necessary.

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  9. Amen! :) Wat fantastisch dat je dit zo uitdrukt. Is echt hard nodig inderdaad.

    Moet toch ook echt nog even zeggen, wat een enorm schattig jurkje! Echt een geweldig leuk ding. Ik vind het super gecombineerd met de leopard jas! Lekker edgy!
    x M

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  10. I was just thinking how hard styling leopard is and then I see you rocking it! I love it, it's unexpected but totally works!

    I love the inspirational post too, I don't know why it can be so hard to accept ourselves the way we are, but you sure are helping :)

    Virginie's Cinema

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  11. Your tumblr comments were great, I have delt with the pressures of being thin but never wanted to go as extreme as that photo, those legs are so thin, its really disturbing.

    Those girls need to read what you wrote, they need some positive influence that being womanly and curvy and HEALTHY is way more "IN" that looking like a skeleton.

    As for your outfit... I really love that knit dress and I think that the leopard goes well with it, I feel the same way about leopard... to incorporate some leopard into my wardrobe I just went with a pair of shoes and a skinny belt in the print. I worried I wouldnt actually use leopard in my wardrobe so I didnt want to make too much of an investment.

    Your outfit looks great :)

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  12. First of all- love the coat with the dress!
    Second of all- I'm so glad you posted this on your blog too. I've really enjoyed the conversation we had about this on tumblr (thanks for the mention too *famous* :DD) and I think it definitely needs to be addressed more.
    After you posted that picture, I went onto that gir's tumblr. Her goal weight in 90lbs. How is that healthy unless you're a child or absolutely tiny?
    It really upsets me too because you know on tumblr I mentioned blog comments where I've been called fat and it makes me question myself far too much.
    I'm really glad you said something and I really hope this makes a difference.
    You are fantastic :]]

    Charlotte xxx

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  13. Love this outfit!
    And I totally agree with your comments, it's just sad when girls think they need to look like that, everyone is perfect the way they are :)
    http://www.closet-fashionista.com

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  14. i love the coat with the dress!! The bright colour looks great with the leopard pattern. Your shoes are soo cute too. So 60s and cute
    I agree with your comments, it's so unhealthy when people aspire to look like that. I try to love every little bit of fat because there are much more important things in life to worry about then a bit of fat. Being healthy and happy is so much better than being thin.
    xJennaD

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  15. I love both your comments, and I totally agree with you. I am so glad to find people like you on the blogosphere that actually have a head over their shoulders, and are beautiful outside as they are inside. Thanks for this post :)

    You look gorgeous by the way, I loove that dress!

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  16. Hey Annebeth, I think I should even quote you when I posted about looking perfect all the time. I get all giddy when you visit my little virtual home. I really get inspired to write because of you and it's really a jungle out there.

    I sometimes think that I put myself way too much out there and people will always be entitled to their own opinion. I love visiting your blog cause of its intellectual content and the photos are just icing on the cake. You're really an inspiration! :)

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  17. Ive noticed a few tumblrs like this, one girl reblogged my photo from your site and so i checked her out and it was full of self harm, i actually felt sick. you're so wonderful for actually saying something, i felt i wanted to but couldnt find the words, as i know from experience that words usually dont do much unless theyre really powerful or from someone important but im sure every little bit helps. xo

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  18. And it's sad on how beauty is defined with our pre-conceived notions. Being skinny doesn't necessarily mean beautiful. :)

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  19. I might write a spin-off of this topic for an upcoming post on my blog... it's an interesting topic that sadly affects too many beautiful girls - and guys. Loving oneself is definitely easier said than done, but everyone deserves to accept his or her body.

    xox

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  20. I love that you reposted this on your blog. well done you saying something.

    p.s. your dress is to die for

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  21. one of the reasons i left tumblr. all that reblogging and nonsense.

    you go girl for saying what you did! i admire you because no one ever stands up like that.

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  22. Oh girl I love the dress with the coat. And I love you most of all. I am glad you wrote about this topic, and have commended you on your outspoken-ness in regards to this before.

    Do you love the weird hairs that grow out of my tummy, though?

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  23. Great post, this is such a terrible issue that has so far to go in terms of awareness. If only more people spoke up about it the way you do! Good for you, and I hope the girl in question and others who see her tumblr read your comment and think about it!

    I am so in love with your dress. And it looks great with the leopard coat! Hmmm!

    M xo

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  24. i don't understand how they find that attractive. they look like a prepubescent boy's chicken legs. why wanna look like a little boy? i love your coat btw :)

    http://fashioneggplant.blogspot.com

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  25. Thank you for speaking out for all us style bloggers! Korean girls would kill to have those chicken legs--it's what's considered "attractive." I can say this because I'm Korean and I see this ALL THE TIME. It's pretty sad :((

    Margaret
    http://myvisionsfugitives.tumblr.com/

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  26. Awwww, this post was amazing. I am SO happy you replied back how you did. It's so terrible how much girls wish they looked different. Positively perfect post. You reached me!:)

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  27. This is why I am always reluctant to talk about any weight-loss wishes I have on my blog; I don't want to send out the message to anyone that being the same weight as me is a bad thing-- it's not. I have curves, and that's just fine. I do want to lose a few pounds, but I don't have the desire to be stick-thin. I have the desire to build healthy habits now, so that I never become part of the obesity that tends to run in my family.

    I'm so glad you said something about that picture. I really hope that girls will be encouraged by you to realize that healthy is beautiful, and that being skinny is not everything in life.

    I had something else typed out, but there was a malfunction and I lost the whole comment. :) Oh well. You are such a beautiful person, inside and out! And I know I said it on Chictopia, but I love the leopard with the colors. You wear it really well!

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  28. I love both your dress & the leopard coat. When I wear my leopard I try to wear one solid color underneath it and to wear accessories in that colour also (ie black dress/tights/boots). I've also worn a royal blue dress underneath (solid) with black tights and heels. Since the leopard pattern is so busy it's best to pair it with a solid regardless if it's black or something brighter.

    Anyways, I'm glad you spoke out on tumblr. As a curvy girl it can be intimidating for me to post style/outfit posts on my blog but I know it's important for girls/women to see that women of all sizes can rock vintage and be chic.

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  29. I really love how much you aren't afraid to speak your mind and take on the role of the "voice of reason." As someone with mental health struggles, it can be difficult for me to take a hard line with anorexia stuff, but, jesus, posing thinspo all over the internet is just plain dangerous. reckless, even. who even takes these pictures? It's awful.

    On a lighter note, your outfit is adorable. The leopard goes wonderfully with that dress, I think!

    xoxo

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  30. love the discussion, it will never stop. it is not only about the fashion or music industry, but face it. in La La blogging land there are some rules about appearance too. look at the 'popular' ones. the fabulous thing is that everybody can have a blog and that a lot of love is being spread.

    But is it a skirt, is it a dress? it is a fabulous dress. love the coat actually, you wouldn't say that it would match so perfectly. I really love it. the blue looks magnificent, but hey, you look gorgeous in every bright color. the cut is also amazing. but i cannot stop looking at the coat.

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  31. kudos to you dear Annebeth, for making a good point to some obviously deranged silly girls.

    Love the dress and the coat, them together? I kind of think it does work...different, risky, but I love combining my leopard prints with contrasting prints and colours :)

    Kisses from Malaga xx

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  32. Amazing post. There are so many anorectic bloggers in the www. There are some blogs with girls as author who are anorectic and who tell their readers that looking like this is normal an beautiful. I couldn't belive it but such blogs truly exist!

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  33. Goed gezegd! Ik vind het echt jammer dat er meisjes zijn die zoveel problemen hebben met zichzelf en hun uiterlijk :s niemand is perfect & het leven is zoveel aangenamer als je gewoon kan aanvaarden wie je bent en hoe je eruit ziet!
    Superleuk, dit jurkje trouwens!
    brunetteblogging.com

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  34. i LOVE that dress. i think people just say they want to look like that bc that is how models look. we are all brainwashed into thinking that is beautiful when you are right... it isnt. it means whoever has those legs is sick...

    <3 steffy
    Steffys Pros and Cons

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  35. Wow, it truly amazes me what so many people find to be attractive or need to have. This person's legs are so skinny, I feel bad. I'm not saying that because I am not skinny, however, there is something to be said about those that are thin & healthy versus those that are unhealthily thin. I'm so glad you posted this, and I love your response. You are truly amazing.

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  36. awesome post! could not agree more. following you :)
    <3 mode
    http://modestylist.blogspot.com

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  37. Amen !



    & de jurk is beeldig met die jas !

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  38. Oehw die jas is gaaf!
    En ja ik begrijp je punt hoor,
    nu moet ik zeggen dat ik het vaak zelf wel erg mooi vind,
    maar ik begrijp ook wel dat niet alles gezond is enzo!

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  39. Thank you for bringing this issue to light. I was one of those naturally thin girls in high school because I was really active through dance. I can't tell you how many girls assumed that I was anorexic (even still, I wasn't nearly as thin as this leg photo). Now I'm a curvier shape, but I still love my body. It's all about adapting & being comfortable with who you are.

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  40. Wow, with all those comments on your post (and to keep it short: I totally agree with your views) I just hope that you don't miss mine here...
    Thanks for stopping by on my blog! To answer your questions: I'm from Germany (Moenchengladbach) quite close to the Dutch border, just about 170km from Antwerp, so this beautiful city isn't totally out of reach ;)
    Have a nice week!

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  41. You're great. :)
    Love that coat!

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  42. I'm so glad I read your text, because when I saw the title of your post, I got a little bit worried. But what you say is just so right!! You said everything I wish I could have said when my friend suffered from anorexia.

    But let's not get too sad out here, I'm also gonna compliment your outfit!! :) I'm in love with your dress, it's so cute and colourful! And the coat matches it great. It's unexpected, but amazing to look at.

    Love, Saskia

    http://formerparades.blogspot.com

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  43. Prachtige comment, ik ben trots op je. Je hebt helemaal gelijk.

    Heel erg lief jurkje ook maar ik zou absoluut niet weten met wat ik het zou moeten combineren. :-D

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  44. You could try pairing it with hot pink. I know that's very Legally Blond, but I think it could work! Or maybe a bright orange :)

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  45. Goede post dit, en ben het ZO met je eens. Ik krijg ineens ook van die 'thinspo' tumblrs in m'n Bloglovin feed en ik walg er zo ontzettend van. Vooral omdat de afbeeldingen die gebruikt worden meestal van meisjes zijn die van zichzelf zo dun zijn en het denk ik niet heel prettig vinden om als 'thinspo' gebruikt te worden. Dun zijn is echt niet alles, ik ben mijn hele (jonge) leven gepest omdat ik te dun was, er waren zelfs mensen die beweerden dat ik een eetstoornis had. Wat ik er in die tijd wel niet voor over had om een paar kilo's extra te wegen, haha! Gelukkig ben ik nu blij met hoe ik ben en ik raad het iedereen aan!

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  46. awesome post! could not agree more. following you :)
    <3 mode
    http://modestylist.blogspot.com

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  47. Amazing post. There are so many anorectic bloggers in the www. There are some blogs with girls as author who are anorectic and who tell their readers that looking like this is normal an beautiful. I couldn't belive it but such blogs truly exist!

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  48. kudos to you dear Annebeth, for making a good point to some obviously deranged silly girls.

    Love the dress and the coat, them together? I kind of think it does work...different, risky, but I love combining my leopard prints with contrasting prints and colours :)

    Kisses from Malaga xx

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  49. I am disgusted by that! Worried for those girls, thank god you're not one of them! I love the leopard and brights mix, works on you!
    La Petite Marmoset

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  50. If I haven't told you lately (and I probably haven't), you are seriously awesome! Seriously, seriously awesome.

    xoxo ~ Courtney
    http://sartorialsidelines.blogspot.com

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  51. For sure! I am 100% with you. It's strange how, even with all of the positive reinforcement and real live fashion communities like "blogland" and chictopia and whatnot, there are still pics like this and girls that want to look that way. Look at 95% of the girls on chictopia... I see plenty of healthy-looking, beautiful females that are stylish and unique. I think people need to open up their eyes to reality and not just "artful" bullshit that circulates the internet.
    On another note... your dress is cute n kinda funky. it made me think of a 60's flight attendant for some reason (not with the coat though :-))

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  52. I got a little worried when I read the title, but I'm glad I scrolled down to the text. I saw your tumblr post this morning. It blows my mind how many girls on tumblr post things like this. I was glad to see you put your own spin on it, and put out an opinion I actually agree with. I've just started tumbling, and I too have been just following everyone back. However, I will unfollow anyone who posts anything I find negative or offensive. Images can poison the mind, and I'm just not going down like that. I really do applaud your stand.... and wow that was long. :P

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  53. Ive noticed a few tumblrs like this, one girl reblogged my photo from your site and so i checked her out and it was full of self harm, i actually felt sick. you're so wonderful for actually saying something, i felt i wanted to but couldnt find the words, as i know from experience that words usually dont do much unless theyre really powerful or from someone important but im sure every little bit helps. xo

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